madly in love with Iraq


To Love again

I have a love crisis since I came back from my unforgettable holiday.

I’ve been fighting to fall in love again with my flat, my work, my friends and my whole life here.

The first weekend; I pulled down the curtains, cleaned the windows, scrubbed the floors and washed every single garment I have. I just wanted for things to look nice and new in my eyes once more….

The second weekend, I invited my close Iraqi friends over for a meal, but in reality I was after their support. I wanted them to appreciate my food and then agree to what I have to say!

I cooked for the whole day while trying to ignore the TV echoing in the background.
I couldn’t bring myself to switch it off, jumping back and forth every time I hear something different in the news.
The result of cooking in a kitchen which looked and felt like a war zone; was soggy rice and an over-cooked curry. Only the fish survived my temper.

I think living in stable countries turns you to a placid person and a dreamer;
One of my friends was trying to push us to weigh up the Middle East crisis differently and don’t let our anger control us, a peaceful solution she pressed. The other was steering the conversation away; bringing up her never ending problems with her husband and blaming it on the situation back home. Another wanted to shut us all up by stating “Don’t waste your time trying to analyse what happened and what will happen next; Saddam is responsible of all our tragedies; Iraq, Lebanon you name it, he has been for the last 40 years or so”.

“Don’t you dare switch on the news, I will leave the minute you do so” the last one to arrive shouted. “I had enough at home, I am here to relax and chat”, and “Please face it we are bad people and God is punishing us for what we are”.
“And how come you are suddenly supporting the turbans?” “I hope it is not the Shia blood in you affecting your brains?”

Those rebellious friends of mine have really changed and have decided on a “We don’t want to know” slogan.

What is frightening; is how submissive we are all becoming. We are starting to believe that there must be something seriously wrong with us. Let alone contributing to the new terms; radical Islam, moderate Islam, Islam phobia, axis of terror and today’s Islam fascists …
On the other hand, you meet others who are so angry and in constant rage; no reason no space for any kind of conversation.

The Media is turning us against each other to distract us from the real culprit, and at the same time accelerating hate and disgust from others toward us.

Can’t you see that we have been slaughtered for the last 50years; first we were put in mass graves and now we are elegantly put in boxes? Is this the difference between dictatorships and democracies?

Can’t you see that we are the only ones who have to abide by UN resolutions or otherwise what is dictated by the US while others do what they want?

Can’t you see that even when we are bombed and maimed; it turns out to be our fault?

Above all can’t you see that the conspiracy theory we are accused of believing in is utterly the only reality?

I can confidently tell you that the 1815 corpses delivered to Baghdad morgue last month made the Israelis day, along with the daily murders in Lebanon.

Wake up, our lives and destinies revolve around the happiness and safety of Israel. And those aliens Israelis who don’t speak our language and don’t share our culture have more right to exist in our own land than us.

No, Israel is not a status quo we have to accept. Israel is a cancer we have to uproot.

After all if we defend our land, we are terrorists; if we got killed it is collateral damage.

Don’t tell me we’d rather have moderate people, there isn’t such thing. Where does moderation come from? You are moderate when you live in moderate surroundings.

I was really charged and ready to face the biggest love crisis of all, the one I’ve been avoiding since I came back…. My Jewish second mother.

I did not want her to say Hizballah is great and Israelis are criminals. I just wanted her to acknowledge our dead. Or at least say both are wrong and we have to do something.

She did not; she blamed it all on Hizballah and just recited whatever their media is broadcasting. I was worse than her and said it all…

I can overcome a loss of a friend; I can survive a failed love affair, but a mother…